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A Guide For Women Finding Self Care Time

They say a woman’s work is never done. A hectic work schedule, combined with trying to balance other areas of your life, may lead to you feeling like you are spinning too many plates in the air at once.

With kids, family, work, chores, and the many responsibilities that we have to fulfill, there never seems to be enough time to let alone think about, never mind fulfill our own needs or desires.

This can lead to women experiencing depression, anxiety, or just a general feeling that you are worn out. I often say sick and tired of being sick and tired.

Besides how it affects us personally, being worn out also means that your performance and attentiveness to all you have to do will suffer. Irritation becomes common, as we feel overwhelmed and unable to deal with the stressors of the day.

Everyone is different, and each individual has different ideas about how to find time to for ‘self’. This is a guide to how make some ‘self’ time. The solutions below are not the only ones but may give you some ideas of how to find space and time in your life.

Utilize The Time You Have

If you have errands to run or appointments to keep but find yourself early or waiting around in your car, make use of the time. For example, read a book or practice meditation. These two activities require a certain amount of tranquility and peace, so why not use your window of opportunity to do this. Of course, you could just listen to some music and relax.

Alternatively, if you were in a more productive mood you could just catch up on paperwork that you have to do. This is your time; you can do with it what you wish. By carrying out this task now, you are freeing up time at a later date.

Make A Date With Yourself (And Keep It!)

Once a week, take time to do the things you like to do alone. To do this you need to learn to say no to the people in your life, or learn to delegate your duties to someone else (mainly talking childcare here people!). This will enable you to have some time to relax.

Go and grab a drink somewhere, get some exercise, or even just disappear to another part of the house. Anything you can think of to do that would enable you to free up space in that busy head of yours.Nature is the best gift you can give to yourself, spending time in nature will energize like no other activity, even if you just sit under a tree in our back yard.

Treat Yourself

This can simply be an extension of the previous where you make a date with yourself. Once a month, go treat yourself, this can be anything you wish, such as shopping, a spa day, a movie, or even just spending time with your friends, catching up on their lives. This is totally your choice. Go and see the great outdoors, spend a day cycling. The point is this is ‘me’ time.

You would think that these tips on finding ‘me’ time would be obvious. However, this time can often be difficult to find. A 2014 UK study looking at working mothers found 51% of them went weeks without relaxing on their own.

When further questioned, nearly 75% of the 2000 women felt they lived their whole lives for other people. Some women are lucky enough to have partners and family to rely on to take the strain; others are not so fortunate. However, there are still things you can do to make time in your life.

Learn to Say No

No, means setting boundaries and limiting what you will or are willing to do in a single day or week. This may mean having to say no to some things, but considering how much your wellness matters, it may be well worth it.

The best tip you all need to know is…

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Be Organized

By planning your day and week you can identify opportunities for ‘me’ time. Making lists and looking at your week would help you to see those times where gaps appear in your schedule. Organization can be the key to doing this.

The more you practice doing this the more you will learn where you can fit things in. It could be as simple as going for a walk for 20 minutes.

On that walk, take a look at the world around you. We live in beautiful world, whether it is a flower or a smile on a person’s face. It is all there for us, you just need to be able to see it.

Now go get yourself some ‘self care’ time.

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The 5 Myths of Extreme Self Care

By Lori Lynn Smith

Ten years ago I was a control freak perfectionist workaholic! I worked 16 hour days, every day. One day, I found myself sitting in my car in the parkade and crying. I was tired, sooo tired!

Right then and there, I made a decision to change my life. I decided that I needed to take care of me! I decided to take back control of my life and start down a plan that focuses on creating a life that I am madly in love with! I started this journey by learning self-love and self-care.

It wasn’t easy and it took time, but today I can say that my life has changed 180 degrees. I make decisions every day that lead me further down the path of self-love and self-care.

I believe 150% that all growth comes from finding yourself first and you can only do that when you can take care of yourself!

Often people comment on my life and ask how I did it… but many many immediately become defensive and start to list off excuses for why they can’t make these changes in their life…. do you find yourself feeling the same way? [Read more…] about The 5 Myths of Extreme Self Care

10 Natural Ways to Reduce Stress for Small Business Owners

By Lori Lynn Smith

Natural Stress relief

Where Does Stress Come From?

From the time you were young you probably heard people talking about being stressed out. Then the moment you experienced stress for yourself, you immediately knew what everyone was complaining about!

Stress is a part of life, but where does stress come from? What is the origin of stress? This is a question that many people ask but can never quite pinpoint it.

Where Does Stress Originate?

If you ask 10 people where their stress comes from you’re likely going to get answers such as their kids, family, work, and especially money. These are stress factors that are common to most of us. Yet, when you receive these answers and really understand them you’ll notice that these are causes of stress but not where the stress actually comes from. So where does stress come from?

There are many different schools of thought about where stress comes from. The fact of the matter is that stress is our body’s response to the demands that we place on it. The demands may be physical, mental, or emotional in nature and when we place these demands on our body, chemicals and hormones like Cortisol and Neuropeptide Y are released into our bodies and then we feel stressed.

Stressful Thinking Leads to Stressful Feelings

Some believe that stress can stem from our own minds. This is true to some extent because we can cause stress through our worries, fears, and anxiety.

We often get into the habit of negative thinking where we can somehow convince ourselves about things that are untrue. For example, have you ever convinced yourself that you aren’t good enough, smart enough, or pretty enough to do something? This negative self-talk creates stress within our own minds. Unfortunately, these thoughts are going on unbeknownst to us because we have come to accept our negative thoughts as truth, even when it’s far from it. This is precisely why we need to begin to tame our negative thoughts and replace them with positive truths.

Stress is a normal part of life so we’ll never be able to escape it. What really matters is how we deal with stress, but we all experience stress differently; hence there’s no universal stress treatment!

Dealing with Stress

As we now know, stress is a bodily response to the pressures and demands that we place on ourselves in every day life. To limit the negative effects of stress – such as heart attack, breathing problems, reproductive problems, and stomach problems – you need to learn how to actively manage your stress. There are many simple stress coping strategies that you can employ such as:

Getting more exercise
Using positive self-talk
Getting more restful sleep
Eating a healthier diet
Knowing your work limits
Saying no when you need to
Asking for help
Creating time for fun
Using positive imagery
Employing deep breathing techniques
Listening to calming music
Clearing your life and workspace of clutter
Keeping things simple

These are all effective ways to deal with the stress in your life, however, you need to remember that the goal is to proactively manage your stress. If you react to your stress, you’ll be spending most of your time putting out fires. Instead, if you constantly implement just a few of these stress management techniques, you will live a healthier, happier, and more productive life!

Stress is something that affects everyone. Stress does serve a purpose and there’s even such a thing as good stress. However, when you feel like your stress is getting out of hand, the best thing you can do for your body is to look for natural stress relievers.

Here are some techniques you can use to reduce your stress level:

Practice yoga and meditation. Yoga and meditation are ancient arts that have been proven to work. They can be practiced separately or together. When you connect the mind, body, and spirit in a healthy, peaceful fashion you feel more relaxed and rejuvenated.

Enjoy the benefits of green tea. Green tea is a natural herb that you can drink or take in capsule form. It’s loaded with beneficial antioxidants to help you achieve a healthy lifestyle. It’s a natural stress reliever and helps boost metabolism to energize you. It may even help with weight loss.

Go for a walk. Many people think that going for a walk is only good for your physical fitness. However, walking can benefit you spiritually and mentally as well. Staying even moderately active increases oxygen levels in your brain, which also improves your mental state. Plus, a 20-minute walk gives your mind a chance to reflect and rejuvenate.

Keep a diary. Keeping a diary can help you unload your thoughts in a private manner. You have the benefits of knowing that your secrets are safe and you can still vent in the process. Venting on paper just might prove to be a great stress reliever.

Try aromatherapy. Many herbs can be used in aromatherapy to calm you in a natural way. Try lavender, rosemary, or peppermint for some popular choices.

Get a full body massage. A massage is a great way to relax your muscles. It also helps to get blood flowing properly throughout the body, which naturally reduces stress.

Listen to music. You may want to try some traditional relaxing music such as classical or world music. However, everyone is different, so experiment with different types of music that you might find relaxing.

Use stress-reducing herbs. Herbs are affordable, natural, and a great way to relieve your stress. There are many herbs that have been known to promote calmness and overall feelings of well-being. Some of them include chamomile and St. John’s Wort.

Take a warm bath. Taking a warm bath is beneficial to your body and mind. The warmth will help your body relax while the peaceful time to yourself will help you achieve a balanced mindset.

Do something funny. The saying “laughter is the best medicine” is no joke! Laughing can definitely help you to relax and therefore reduce stress. Do something you personally find funny, like going to a comedy show or hanging out with a good friend.

You’ll soon find that there are endless possibilities for natural ways of reducing your stress. Your job will be to find out what works best for you personally. As long as you take time out of each day to take a break and unwind, you’ll be well on your way to reducing your stress.

Photo Credit: anna gutermuth via Compfight cc

The Law Of Attraction enhanced by Breathing Mediation

By Lori Lynn Smith

Breathling Meditation

The law of attraction is all about magnetizing your visualization so that whatever that you have asked the universe for, will be attracted to you. An interesting idea is a practice to harness the powers of electro-magnetic energy in the body is to sleep with the head of the bed pointing North, parallel to the earth’s magnetic poles. When all the molecules in the body are synchronized in one direction, they become magnetic, and will draw whatever you wish for from the universe.

I feel like one of the most important element in harnessing this magnetic energy is the practice of deep breathing. Oxygen is food for the brain and it has own magnetic qualities.

Really you can practice deep breathing any where and anytime it is so easy. But let’s add in some super fresh air, I love crisp frosty mornings, you know where the air is so clean you can feel it. The quality of the air and the oxygen in it is best in the morning, because the production of oxygen by the plants and trees is done at night. This is the reason why when we wake up in the morning to go to the office, we notice that the air is cool and fresh, because the oxygen has just been produced. We become more energetic and alert when we breathe in the morning air, as compared with the afternoon air.

I highly recommend that you throw open a window and let some fresh air in. Better yet, take you breathing outside, find a garden, where fresh oxygen has just been produced from the plants’ photosynthesis. Or breathe the morning air on the hills or the salty breezy air of the sea. Oxygen makes you magnetic and causes your thoughts to attract whatever you are asking the universe.

If you can wake up at 5 am in the morning (I suggest you do because a lot of successful people wake up at this time as a matter of discipline), do your meditation, visualization and deep breathing at the same time by an opened window. I enjoy the stillness of dawn in the spring with the fresh crispy air in the garden. As I sit on the lawn chair I meditate, visualize and performed deep breathing and sent out my order to the universe. With the sound of birds chirping in the distance, it makes my meditation surreal and powerful. After spending about 20 minutes on this, I reward myself with a hot cup of tea. What a wonderful way to start the day.

The quality of the manifestations by the universe and the end result is dependant on the quality of your thought power. The signal that you send out has to have the power of electro-magnetic energy harnessed from the earth’s magnetic poles and the fresh oxygen of the morning. When you are magnetic, the universe will hear you more clearly, because your thought waves are more powerful. You will begin to notice life starting to change for the better. Your wishes will come true, you become healthier and more energetic, and people find you more attractive.

5 Ways to Motivate Yourself!

By Lori Lynn Smith

“Throughout the centuries there were men who took first steps down new roads armed with nothing but their own vision.”

-Ayn Rand, was a Russian-American novelist, philosopher, playwright, and screenwriter.

Self-Motivation is not something that is easy to come by.

How can you motivate yourself?

There will always be times in your life when you have to perform tasks that you deem unpleasant for one reason or another – working with a co-worker you don’t like, going to work on Mondays, taking the garbage out, driving to meet the in-laws at the airport, having dinner with the spouse’s friends…

Doing these things just siphons whatever motivation you have inside you and makes you feel sad, tired, sorry, even annoyed. But did you know that there are also things inside you that actually make it difficult to feel excited and enthusiastic?

Get to know the factors that make hard to get motivated:

Your mindset

Your mindset is a major factor that can get in the way of motivation. This is because it can severely limit your understanding of the world and all experiences in general. Your mindset can be a mine field of barriers. These walls are composed of old beliefs, prejudices, biases and standards. For example, if you refuse to believe that you can actually write for a famous magazine because you’re a person from a small town, you’ll miss out on an opportunity to expose your talent and reap its rewards.

Your comfort zone

We all have certain limitations in our minds. These limits are things we decide on based on our own personal beliefs, ethics and standards. Within these limits, we feel comfortable and safe, like a nice warm blanket.

Once we approach the outer edges of our blankie, we begin to feel discomfort, shyness, embarrassment or annoyance. We just don’t want to go any further because we just can’t look past what we don’t know or haven’t experienced. Because we have a fear of the unknown, we’d rather stay within our comfort zones because we feel safe and secure.

The problem is that a narrow comfort zone can get in the way of your motivation. Each time you are presented with a new idea or experience, you check to see if it fits into your comfort zone. If it doesn’t, then you simply refuse, no questions asked. This is unfortunate because many of these ideas and experiences can be good for you. But you’ll probably never know because you don’t have the motivation to try them.

Your past experience

Your background – personal, social and professional experiences – has a lot to do with how you decide things in your life. They can also be factors that get in the way of motivation. If these experiences are negative, they tend to make you more hesitant and unsure of yourself because they affect your self-esteem and confidence.

For Example, if you’ve only been met with rejection or ridicule in your life, it wouldn’t be hard to imagine if you don’t feel a strong need to excel or to improve yourself. You’ll probably be thinking – ‘So what? Nothing I ever did was good anyway. Why would things change now?’ Unless you consciously make an effort to identify these past experiences and then refuse to let them rule your life, you will always be hard to motivate.

However, there are a few tips that you can consider when you feel that you cannot push yourself further or farther.

1. Know exactly what you want. What are you motivating yourself to do? Do you merely want to finish a job, or do you want to earn a lot of money? Set tangible or realistic goals for yourself. If you know exactly what you want, you can get it, and you can motivate yourself to get it.

2. Make your passion your work. The problem with a lot of people is that they work hard but they don’t know what their work is for. Do they want money? Are they simply working toward money? Do you want money, or does your money have a purpose? Give yourself a tangible purpose so that you can know what you are working for. Striving for money is an empty goal; striving for money so that you can get a good house and a nice car might be more tangible; striving for more money so that you can help your siblings go to college, your parents to enjoy their retirement, and your family to have a better house and car might be even better.

3. Practice Self Care. Sometimes, being burned out means that you need to stay away from things for a moment, have some time alone to yourself, and get an outsider’s view of your situation. When you start getting fatigued more often, your body might be telling you to slow down; and slowing down can mean re-energizing yourself by taking a vacation, or even just taking a walk. You may want to set aside some alone time each day for you to recharge, so that you are not constantly being barraged with work.

4. Don’t be afraid to say no. Sometimes, you can get so much work or responsibilities that you are saturated with stress, and you reach the point where you simply want to give up. Keep things on a manageable level. You need to stay sane to keep keeping on.

5. Reward yourself! Plan a trip for yourself or promise to take yourself to the movies if you complete your work with little stress. Little rewards, a walk in the park or a spa day can work wonders on your stress level.

Ultimately Self-Motivation is your to command, if you take the necessarily steps to break free from your old mindset, your comfort zone and your past experiences and treat yourself with the respect that you so totally deserve. Create an environment that has only one purpose, to support and motivate you.

Photo Credit: By Tara Angkor Hotel

Two Mindfulness Exercises

By Lori Lynn Smith

Mindfulness exercises let you “tune in” to yourself. Distractions are let go, and your brain power is increased. The exercises help you think more clearly and concentrate better. The best news is that they are easier than you might think to learn.

Easy Mindfulness Exercises

Anytime you are stressed, stop, and carefully watch yourself to identify what’s bothering you. You may be expecting something bad to happen, or perhaps there is an argument going on just below the surface of your consciousness, or you’re worried about something, or in pain in some way. Notice everything you can.

This self-observation is crucial. It will get easier as you do it more. You’ll start to realize just how many things are going on in your own head, distracting you.

Now deal with these mind-irritants. Make the phone call that’s on your mind, take an aspirin, apologise to whomever you were fighting with. You can write things on tomorrow’s to-do list, to get them off your mind. And if there’s nothing you can do right now, tell yourself that. When you do this exercise, you’ll feel less stressed, and more able to concentrate on the tasks at hand. You can have more brain power today.

A Better Mindfulness Exercise

Sit down, relax and breath deeply through your nose. Let your eyes close and be aware of your breath going in and out. Move your attention to your body, one part at a time, noting sensations of cold, hot, tight, sore and anything else you identify. After a few minutes, start listening to sounds in the room, without thinking about them. Just listen, while still maintaining an awareness of your body and your breath.

In ten minutes or so, or when it feels right, open your eyes and look around as if you are seeing for the first time. Let your eyes rest on an object for half a minute, examining it without talking about it in your mind. Then move to another object, and another, while still maintaining an awareness of your body, your breathing, and any sounds. Just stay in this state of mindfulness for a few minutes, until you are ready to get up.

When you are aware of your body, breath and immediate enviroment, you are more fully “in the moment.” Your mind is in a receptive state, with fewer mental distractions that can prevent clear thinking. An exercise like this before important mental tasks will give you greater brain power, specifically more focus and concentration. Today is a good day to learn something new. Why not try one of these mindfulness exercises?

photo credit: by -RejiK